Idiot Sighting

Bootie · Jan 28, 2010

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My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a Ã‚Â£5 note. Our total was Ã‚Â£4.20, so I also handed her a twenty pence piece
She said, 'you gave me too much money.'
I said,'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me Ã‚Â£1 back.'
She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the 20 pence and said 'We're sorry but they could not
do that kind of thing.' The clerk then proceeded to give me back 80 pence in change..

Do not confuse the clerks at MacD's.
IDIOT SIGHTING #2
We had to have the garage door repaired. The GARADOR repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.
I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one GARADOR made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4
horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, 'NOOO, it's not. Four is larger than two..'
We haven't used Garador repair since. Happened in Moor Park, Nr Watford UK
IDIOT SIGHTING #3
I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbour call the Highways Department to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'
Story from Potters Bar , Herts , UK
IDIOT SIGHTING #4
My daughter went to a local Kentucky Fried Chicken and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.

From South Oxhey Herts , UK ...
IDIOT SIGHTING #5
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an Irish airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?'
To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'
He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'
Happened Luton Airport .... UK
IDIOT SIGHTING #6
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged co-worker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'
She is a local County Councillor employee in Harrow, Middlesex , UK
IDIOT SIGHTING #7
When my husband and I arrived at our local Ford dealer to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.
'Hey,' I announced to the Fitter/Mechanic, 'its open!'
His reply, 'I know. I already did that side.'
This was at the Ford dealership in St Albans,Hertfordshire UK .
STAY ALERT!
[FONT=&quot]They walk among us ... and the scary part is that is they have the RIGHT [/FONT]

PoorOldSpike · Jan 28, 2010

My fridge stopped working recently and began to thaw out, water everywhere, I put in a new fuse but it still wouldn't work,dead as a dodo, so i nipped out and bought a new mini-fridge for Ã‚Â£77 (124 US dollars).
But when I got home my old fridge was working again!
I researched "How fridges work" on the net and learned that subzero weather can stop a fridge working, my old one packed up during a subzero cold spell so that must have been the reason, then when the weather warmed up, it started working again, duh..
Oh well the old one needed replacing anyway because its thermostat knob snapped off years ago, so i'll use the new 'un from now on anyway..

Bootie · Jan 28, 2010

Or you could place it beside your PC and use it to store cold beverages and ice lollies.

PoorOldSpike · Jan 28, 2010

True story- yesterday i had to phone AOL because I couldn't log on, and a member services guy said "I'll send you an e-mail outlining the steps you need to go through".
"But how can i read your mail if I can't log on?" I asked.
He evaded the question and waffled on a bit then said "You probably need a new router, we'll do a line test and send you one if necessary, phone us back in 48 hours"
"48 hours??" I answered.
"Yes" he replied, "we can't do it til then"
What a shambles! I mean, did he seriously think i was going to sit twiddling my thumbs offline for 48 hours?
I'd have signed up with another server but luckily i was able to get back on line by clicking a few "one-click fixes" without his help..

Bootie · Jan 28, 2010

Me and a colleague at work were discussing the prison system in the UK and specifically a newspaper article which stated that if all foreign nationals within the prison system were sent back to their home country to see out there sentence it would significantly ease the pressure on the UK prison system... to which my colleague replied... 'You cant do that... they have to have a criminal record in order to be deported'... I nearly pissed myself laughing.

95bravo · Jan 28, 2010

If the fridge is inside the apartment, how does the weather outside effect it? Or was it outside so the pidgeons you use as Bristol bombers had access to it...

PoorOldSpike · Jan 28, 2010

The fridge is in my unheated kitchen, so when the weather outside is subzero, my kitchen becomes like Ice Station Zebra hovering a degree or two above freezing and the fridge switches itself off. I wouldn't mind, but the ice buildup in its freezing compartment then starts to melt and there's water everywhere

Bert Blitzkrieg · Jan 29, 2010

PoorOldSpike said:
The fridge is in my unheated kitchen

Old house ? Or is that it almost never freezes in Portsmouth ?

Bootie · Jan 29, 2010

POS' house used to be used as a cave by neanderthals its that old.

Rico · Jan 29, 2010

LOL -- previous tenants wore fur and painted themselves blue all over. :lol:

Bootie · Jan 29, 2010

Smurfs??

Nathangun · Jan 29, 2010

This is true, I remember when I was a nipper there was a tyre repair centre near where I lived. It advertised "buy 4 tyres for the price of 5 and get one free."

PoorOldSpike · Jan 29, 2010

Bootie said:
POS' house used to be used as a cave by neanderthals its that old.

Possibly..

What has become known as "Cattedown Man" was the earliest known inhabitant of the Plymouth area.
Taking his name from the limestone cave in the Cattedown area of Plymouth where he was found in 1887, the bones of 15 early humans were discovered intermixed with fossils of woolly rhinoceros, reindeer, hyenas lion and woolly mammoth all dating from the Ice Age. The remains could be up to 140,000 years old and are thought to be the oldest ever found in the British Isles.
http://www.plymouthdata.info/Prehistoric Plymouth.htm

The cliff face across the water where Cattedown Man and his mates lived-

Here's an early pic of my place (blue arrow), though of course its been built and rebuilt loads of times over the centuries; a pub called 'The Welchmans Arms' once stood on the site-

My place now, I've got the whole top floor-

2054172 · Jan 29, 2010

Not much insulation in that building I bet. You live in the rafters!

PoorOldSpike · Jan 29, 2010

2054172 said:
Not much insulation in that building I bet. You live in the rafters!

Yes, there was Cattedown Man, and i'm Rafter Man

Idiot Sighting

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