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mTk's Humor Strikes Again. You've Been Warned!

Can't wait to use this!
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Yeah! What he said!
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Water taste better at night because that's when it's ripe.
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Food for thought: Are mashed potatoes just Irish guacamole?
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Sometimes I shock myself with the smart stuff I say and do.
Then there are the times when I try to get out of the car with my seatbelt on.
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You: "I'm only 35, I have my whole life ahead of me."
Sports Broadcaster: "Here comes the oldest player in the league. He's 32. A miracle."
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This chef on TV just said "Where there's fat, there's flavor."
I know he was talking about food , but I still took it as a compliment.
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I accidentally drank some Holy Water with my laxative.
I'm about to start a religious movement.
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We're at the aquarium and I said "Check out the Chorse."
My wife: That's a seahorse.
Me: I know how to spell chorse. I'm not an idiot.
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Kid: "What are condoms used for?"
Dad: "To avoid such questions."
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My wife said she wanted to take a bath in milk. I asked pasteurized be OK?
She said up to my chest would be fine.
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How much water could the Spanish Armada hold?
About 20 galleons.
 
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